Pretty freakin’ UGLY I usually say!

LOL.

Seriously though.  What’s been nice is that I’ve had the ambition lately to “pretty up”.

So I did my own nails last night, and I’ve done other things.  All in a effort to feel better about myself.  I still carry a huge chunk of self hate around.  So this is a nice little break.
And a box of chocolate is always nice……..right?

Ehh…Not bad.  That chocolate was good though.

 

 I love green Jello!!!

And today was the perfect day to have forgotten about it ,then find it in my fridge waiting as if it knew I have been having a terrible week.

Hello Jello!

 

 

My woes started off on Saturday morning when I lost water.  Nada!!  Nothing ran through my pipes.  I ended up calling a plumber, and paying for a new pump for my well.  I felt like I should have gotten a discount, because I had to help this guy pull the old pump up from inside the well.  Then my Father in law helped the guy put the new well in.

To top it off.......I got a call from the Plummer later in the evening, just as I had pulled in to the Walmart parking lot, to tell me that he had put in the wrong pump.

He came the next day and changed out the pump again.  Luckily he brought a helper that time.

 

Then Monday night the temps got warm enough that the snow melted, and everything that was left in my driveway ended up in my garage!!

I found this out as soon as I let the dogs out Tuesday morning.  I had about 3 inches of water in there.  Probably 6 inches in some places.

What a mess!!!  I still had a lot of things stored in the garage.  Not to mention all the stuff like boxes and papers that I would throw in there to "deal with later".  I'll say it again.....What a mess!!!!!

My brother in law and his youngest boy came over to help me get it cleaned up.

To add salt to this wound, as I bent over to pick up what looked like soggy paper towels my smart phone fell out of my bra and plopped in the water.  

I tried to save it by submerging it in rice for 24 hours.  But it's a total loss.  Grr.

 

Then today......one of my baby birds died.

Emily spent the night with me so when she went in to play with the babies, she found him dead.

 

So..... When I found that jello in my fridge not only did it make me smile, but it made me remember my sweeeeeet baby boy Noah.

His favorite color was green, but the only thing green he would eat was JELLO, frozen green beans, raw green peppers and Popsicles.

 

I love green jello!

HELLO!!!!!

I know, I know.  I haven't written.

I have been incredibly busy!  Keeping myself VERYYYYY busy.
It’s a good thing because I feel like I am getting things DONE.  I’m mostly working on the insides of the house.

I’ve gotten one room done.  The spare room.  And I am working on the main bathroom.

This is the spare room.

This room is honestly about my struggle with the color YELLOW!
I’ve disliked it for SOO long, but now I am coming around to enjoying it.  It’s hard for me to admit.  But I can’t deny it.  And of course….we all know I love the color purple.

I will take a DONE picture of the bathroom when it is complete.
There is VERY little left to do in there.

 

I’m doing REALLY well I think.
A lot of people have said they notice a difference in me also.  So I hear.

Just the fibromyalgia is giving me fits.
I have a lot of pain, a lot of the time.  It’s worse than it was 3 months ago….that’s for sure.

I’m not sure if it’s because it’s the winter months………
Or something I cannot imagine.

 

Hum.

I wasn't even reluctant when I first heard of this idea from a online friend that I have had since the late 90's.

I never know what to put for a title of my posts.  Unless of course I know what I am going to write about ahead of time.  Today I don't.

I've been feeling wonderful over the past few days.
I'm almost worried that a shoe is going to drop.
Always waiting for something bad to happen. Its hard to enjoy the moment when you feel like a black cloud could show up at any time.

I've started to read again. In my spare time.
What's good about that, is I force myself to get my work done so i can sit and relax with my Nook.
Currently I am reading the beginning of one of Nora Roberts series. I've always wanted to read her books but never knew where to begin. Once I got it figured out, I realized that i am enjoying her writing style more than I thought I would.
I've also added a new tool to my life for organization, and it's really helping.
Even with my memory problems. Course the bad memory isn't going away, but the new skills I am using are really making life less irritating.

Since the kids have a foot out the door, I am spending more and more time on my own. Realizing it's not so bad. It's not like they are moving out of state. I have been enjoying the peaceful serenity of my house, with my dogs.
Tucker is a very good protector. He doesn't even know it.

I gave Scotty a bath. I was going to shave him down, but when I was brushing him out I realized he didn't have any knots so I just cleaned up his face and cut the hair around his feet. Now he's all pretty.

I also got the front door painted last night.
I turned it from a lime green to a nice light latte' with chocolate trim.

Not bad huh?
It's already almost noon, and I'm still in my jammies!!
Gotta run!

So this evening began chaotic! Kind of annoying, because I had some things that I wanted to concentrate on. I got Emily from walmart so I could go in and get the phone that her father and I agreed that we would pay upfront for her. There was only 3 left, so thankfully I gave in to my urge to say screw it, I'm not going back into town.
I had already been in town once to do shopping for myself.
Then Beth came home to get Emily, and some stuff for the night.
They are still working on the apartment, and Emily needs a ride to work tomorrow morning.
I'm not going in town twice tomorrow!

Now that the house is quiet, and the only things I can hear are clocks ticking, me typing and the water heating up in the water machine. I feel really sleepy.

I rolled my van over today. Figuratively speaking of course.

This makes me feel sad, considering I have only had the van since March.
Yes.....I put 20k mile on my van in 8 months!!

It hasn't been 8 months since March has it really?
Good Lord where is the time goiing?

I don't have any idea why it is everyone is pissy with me about Beth getting married!!

Another half sister of mine, the second of three, appears to be disappointed. I'm assuming because she wasn't told about the wedding. The wedding that wasn't a wedding. They ELOPED for crying out loud!! And only the two sets of parents knew.
I'm really good at reading people by the language thy use. Verbal, and physical. So of course when someone says something to me in a message over Internet or text, I have to use the words they use to read how that person is feeling. I admit, that it isn't fool proof, and I could be wrong some of the time, but admittedly sounding conceded, that is rare. As long as I have talked to the person, in person before.
So with that being said, the message that I got from dear ol sister sounded snide and rather snotty. The message I got was not that of what the text said, but of the feeling I got behind it.

I guess congratulations

............is what she said in text.
I guess......yeah, thanks.

I am bothered by this, because it was just recent that my two oldest half sisters and I made a plan to get to know one another better, because we have been so distant. Not to mention there are a lot of hurt feeling over the past having to do with parents, divorce, a new little sister, step mother, a neglectful and mentally abusive mother and screwy looie all around. All of which started before I was even born.


Blah..... Back on subject!
Another thing that is reallllly making me mad is the comments about Beth being pregnant!!
She is NOT pregnant!!!! Beth and Trevor got married because they love each other and see a long future ahead of them. ALSO......they wanted to get married on 11-11-11! Because that date will NEVER happen that way again, in their lifetime!

Now, I'll get off my soap box.
And promise that I will not loose sleep over these frustrations. EVER!!
This is the beautiful couple


















P.S
Disclaimer for anyone who might be offended by my writing this.
I've been writing about my life for as long as I can remember.
I'm not going to stop now. I use to do so in private, but airing the dirty laundry in the wide open world seems to be much more therapeutic for ME. Sorry.

Well I had planned to stay home today after I took Emily to work, but I ended up doing more in town than I planned. Plans don't seem to work out for me well anymore.
I'm going to try this stay home thing again tomorrow.

With the girls moving out I feel like I'm walking around in my life with no purpose. No beginning, and no ending. I just don't know what to do or where to start. But I have a lot that I would like to do. Just can't get started.

I'm going to try some new supplements..... Looks promising. Yes???

I'm skeptical though....
I will update on this later.

On another note.........

I saw a unusually large amount of crack today.
The most disturbing was that of a large middle age man walking out of and away from a gas station/convenient store.
Then whiled driving to town the second time I saw a man working under his car. Another large man. Bent over. But what was most disturbing about him was his shirt looked too small, so his biiiiig ol beer gut was floppin all down too!

Why?????

I'm not at all sure why my yes caught these things today. I certainly didn't WANT to view these things. It almost reminds me of those guys that wear the pants down under the butt cheek and show off the underwear.

WHY????????

Well it's going on 7:00pm.....and normally lately that's been my bedtime.
So. I'm gonna go take a nice long nap.

Tally ho

I got a new gadget for blogging, and I am trying it out this evening.

So much to talk about but then again I don't have much to say either.
My daughter and her boyfriend got married yesterday

You say WHAT?

Yeah, it was sudden, and with a notary. Not exactly the huge wedding that they were hoping for some months ago when they first got engaged.
They defiantly have a long bumpy road ahead of them.......for sure! But, Travis and I made it work. I believe they can too.
And for those of you that are wondering.......NO they did not HAVE to get married. No one is with child.

So..... I'm going to go have more fun with this thing and see what more I can do with it.

Tally ho!

In a lot of ways I’m quite anxious for the girls to move out.

They have an apartment in town that they are getting ready to move into this month.
I’m anxious so that perhaps I can keep my house clean for more than ten minutes at a time, and I’ll have 2 more rooms to claim and make mine.

But I dread all of this at the same time!
With as much as they are gone now I feel lonely, and deprived of human contact.
It’s just me and the dogs……….Travis won’t be back for a while.

And I get so tired!  Often I need help with things that have to get done and I can’t do them because I get incredibly tired so fast.

Research I have done on the fibromyalgia suggests that the chronic fatigue is one of the symptoms of this syndrome.  It helps to know that there is a reason for being this tired……..but it doesn’t make it go away!